In Loving Memory of the Late George Hogan

Dear readers,

I regret to inform you that a dear friend of ours and my former co-researcher has been brutally slain at the hands of several members of the Korean Indoctrination Ministry (KIM). The exact manner of his death is still unclear; however, with the help of several inside sources I’ve been able to glean some small bits of the process of his appalling departure from this cruel world.

As is well known, the late George Hogan has been an ardent critic of the systematic cultural indoctrination of the Korean people. On more than several occasions he has proudly endured scathing and malicious condemnation from the Korean media for daring to question some of the most fundamental Korean beliefs. Most recently he was accused of boldly insisting that Korea may be only 4723 years old—an intolerable affront to Korean self-worth and national pride. Indeed, it was this final offence that sealed his fate.

Witnesses have explained to me that he was bagged and dragged from his apartment early on the morning of the 26th of this month. From there he was taken to the KIM’s notorious secret torture and reeducation compound deep inside Wonderland’s Central Office. After being forced to endure 10 hours of the sappiest Korean soap operas, he was then pelted until insensible with large rocks collected from the shores of Dok-Do. Once unconscious, he was stuffed into a large pot of Kim-Chi that was buried in some as yet undisclosed location. I have been assured by inside sources that in a final act of symbolic benevolence the KIM chief overseeing the execution requested that the Kim-Chi be made less spicy, as it is well-known by Koreans that foreigners (especially Western foreigners) lack both the racial purity and the long history of Japanese oppression that allows Koreans to endure spicy food.

Despite the current situation I have vowed to finish the research begun by George and I. Doubtlessly, without George’s superb insight into the labyrinth-like world of Korean culture this research will be incalculably more difficult. Nonetheless, I’m now posting the first installment of our still incomplete work on Korean brothel culture. I send my sincerest condolences to the family and friends of the late George Hogan. It is my hope that by dedicating this book to his memory some solace will be brought to his survivors.